Jane Austen Runs with the Bulls

       Jane Austen is an action figure.
      Yes, you heard right.

       Ms. Jane comes complete with "writing desk and quill." 

        If this doesn't offend your sense and sensibilities, you can pretend to have a clueless Emma match up Ken and Barbie and send them off to the prom.
        Personally, I think this is replete with possibilities and a lot more fun than G.I. Joe.  

      Let your imagination run wild.

      But wait.  Miss Jane is not out there all by her lonesome.  Oh, no. Amaze your friends. Collect them all.
      The pantheon of "literary action figures" includes Oscar Wilde, Edgar Allan Poe and  Shakespeare. Head shrinkers are represented by Freud and Carl Jung. Atom smashers by Einstein.
        Here's Edgar:

    

                  Please note that Edgar comes complete with a raven on his shoulder. Possibly "nevermore" is sold separately.
                  And here's Oscar:

             Oscar, dressed to party hardy, is dashingly accessorized with a walking stick. According to The Writer's Store, this is apt since Mr. Wilde was known, not only for his "comedic plays" and "quick wit," but also for  his "eccentric dress." Presumably the removable cane will allow Oscar to stab you in the front, rather than the back, as true friends do.  Another of my favorite Oscar quotes: "It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious."
      Freud is holding something in  his hand. Can't tell from the picture, though, whether the object is just a cigar.

But perhaps my favorite is Ernest Hemingway:

         
       Not only does Papa come complete with "typewriter and shotgun" but he also appears to be wearing a Hemingway T-shirt and leaning on a saber. The promotional copy says that "a child can role play, pretending to roam in Africa, fish in Cuba, hunt in Michigan, and write the great American Novel."
       I figured if there was a Hemingway action figure, there should be one for F. Scott Fitzgerald. Perhaps sitting drunk at a Paris cafe. Or dancing in a New York City fountain with crazy Zelda.  But alas. The author of The Great Gatsby apparently only rates a finger puppet:

  But he's in good company.  James Joyce has one too.

So do Hemingway and Mark Twain.

Four years of college have come down to this. It's all flashing before my eyes.